After getting off the phone with Ed, my brother-in-law Alan, and my godmother Joanne came to the hospital. They were obviously in shock too. After telling them the details, I witnessed something that was beautiful, yet disturbing at the same time: my godmother started touching my brother's body. Not touching him like she was feeling for anything, but caressing him, as though letting him know everything would be ok, even though he was gone. Then she started saying how young he was, how sad it was, how he didn't deserve this, etc...On one hand, it was sweet to see someone caring for him like this, showing him love when he could no longer even feel it, but on the other hand, he was gone...cold...hard...motionless. I felt jealous, envious, even removed; that she could touch him like that, but there was no way I could or even would. I guess that's why we have always considered her our second mother. Not only is she my godmother, she is also Denise's, and also my nephew Tino's godmother. So she is family.
Well like I said, I got the crash course of what it was like to have a family member pass away. All the feelings I went through that day. Feelings I had never experienced before, feelings that would only help me through the times ahead.
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